I need to be honest. Other things that are seemingly very important are bombarding me, so today, when my daughter said, “So, what are we doing for family fun tonight?” I half-snapped, “I don’t know that we’ll be doing that today. I have too much to get done.” This child is so easy-going, she just kindly replied, “Okay. Well, maybe we could watch one episode of a show as a family…or not if you’re too busy.” I’m serious. It was like hearing the Lord saying, “Where are your priorities?” around the words she was saying. It amazes me how easily I forget why I’m doing what I’m doing and how important keeping my priorities straight is. I guess whether I get my work done or not, there will be family fun tonight!
I’m working on keeping my priorities straight, but to be honest, it’s still such a struggle! Why IS THAT? Am I the only one who has a hundred things coming at me at once and they ALL seem pressing? My house is a mess! I have laundry coming out my ears (backyard camping and shaving cream fight all in one night creates a lot of extra laundry!) I have commitments for the entire week and will pretty much not be home at all. And on top of all of that, one of my children needs a LOT of extra parenting right now. And that means that I need to spend A LOT of extra time in prayer! It all hits at once!
But what have I been saying to you for months now? One step at a time. What are the next three things I need to do? And as I have been checking items off my list, I have been able to breathe more easily. I am making progress on my to do list. When I think of taking it one step at a time, I can break through the overwhelm and get to work on my list…and when starting a list of to-dos, it’s more important than ever to keep our priorities in mind.
5 Things to Remember When Setting Priorities
- God First—
Maybe you’ve read or heard the story that talked about a woman who had so many things to get done that she didn’t have time to pray. I spend a lot of my days feeling that way! I wake up early and hit the ground running on my list and my daily schedule! But the longer this woman lived, the more she learned. She realized that when she did not take time to pray, things just didn’t go well. Because when we are not in step with the Spirit, life is harder! In any case, she learned the hard way that when you have a lot to do, you don’t have time to NOT pray!
Similarly, the illustration of the rocks in the jar shows us that when we get our priorities straight, the other things fall into place. Time with the Lord needs to be the biggest rocks! We need the Lord to bless our efforts during the day, or our work will be futile. If we do not make time with Him our first priority, the other things just don’t fall into place the way we need them to!
- Remember Your Husband—
This is a big one for me. Though I try to make my husband my top priority after the Lord, sometimes children and chores seem more pressing! And as an adult, he can wait. But that’s not okay. My husband is usually the one person in my family with whom a little attention goes a long way. Seriously, it means the world to him if I just make dinner! A “thank you for all you do” and a hug go a long way with him. And taking the time to do that when I’m swamped means even more to him.
- Children are not taking you from more important work—
This one is the biggest thing I need to remember and the most helpful in keeping my priorities straight! A couple of my children just need extra from me. They need extra parenting, more discipline, more teaching, more reminding, and definitely extra patience! It can be draining at times, especially when the list of regular work and chores keeps growing!
When I make my daily schedule, I don’t typically schedule in the behavioral issues that might take an hour of prayer, discussion, consequences, not to mention the time it takes to execute the consequences or make sure they’re being followed through on. So, when that happens a few times a day sometimes, it’s frustrating and stressful!
Even when my children just want me to spend time playing with them—it’s so hard! There are piles and piles of laundry, dishes to wash just in time to make another meal, and other commitments screaming for me. There is work to be done and projects to do and no matter how well I plan things out and break them down into smaller steps so that I still have time for my children, it just doesn’t always work that way!
But my children are not taking me away from more important work. Other, less important tasks take me away from my children. I need to remember this! They are my most important work!
So, when my child needs an hour of my time just to unpack and work through behavioral issues that keep cropping up, that’s IMPORTANT! There is nothing more important in that moment than dealing with that issue. Dinner will have to wait. And even though it drives me crazy when my children are taking clothes out of the piles of unfolded laundry, they’ll live through it and so will I. It will just have to wait…because parenting is my MOST IMPORTANT JOB! Children don’t wait. They grow up quickly and we get but a tiny amount of time to teach them what they need to know.
Children are big rocks in your jar! Spend the time with them.
- Don’t worry about the small stuff—
Life can get overwhelming over things that really don’t matter very quickly. Usually, for me, it’s when one of my big rocks are not in place (i.e. if I’m not spending time with the Lord like I should; or not prioritizing my family like I should) that I start to get overwhelmed by the small things. When a big rock is out of place, the small rocks don’t fit like they should…and every.little.thing. starts to annoy me. I become unable to see past the piles of stuff that needs to be put away; or the yet-again flooded basement that needs to be cleaned up and dried out; or the commitments away from home that will take all of the time that I could use to take care of these things.
All of those small things will still be there next week! And yes, it might be worse by the time I finally get to it, but it will get done eventually either way. And I can be proud of myself for keeping my priorities straight and I’ll be able to say, “All’s well that ends well.”
- See the big picture—
It is so difficult to take a step back and see the big picture sometimes! This week, we are having Vacation Bible School at our church, which will require my time every morning. This morning, I was feeling so overwhelmed by everything in my mind that was adding to the mile-long list, that I almost stayed home from church.
You can see where this is going. I have learned over the years though, that when I feel like going to church the least, I need to be in church the most. So, I got ready and went to church. In my mind, I keep thinking of how much I could get done around my house if I just dropped my children off at VBS and had that time by myself! But VBS is so important!
So, I need to take a step back and see the big picture. I have a chance to make a difference in the lives of my own children, as well as the lives of other children. It’s not a difficult decision. Obviously, I need to take the opportunity to make a difference in people’s lives. Having a clean house will not really make a difference in anyone’s life right now. And at the end of my life, I won’t have anyone standing up at my funeral saying, “She kept her home immaculate!” but I pray that I will have people saying, “She was the best mom I could have asked for” and “She made a difference in my life.”
That’s the big picture I want to live. So, this will most likely be the week that I get drop-in company—because no one ever drops in when my house is clean. And I’ll be humbled and survive that too. In the end, keeping my priorities straight and making a difference in the world will serve me better than anything else!
RElated: What to Include in Your Daily Schedule
