We have only one week left to meet our mom goals in the Be a Better Mom Challenge! Can you believe it? I actually am not sure whether it’s flown by…or dragged on. Both, at times, I suppose. In any case, I hope you feel that you have gained value and insight into your own parenting and why you do what you do. The main thing I hope you have taken away from this so far is the value in what you are doing each day. Mom, you matter!
Has this time made you a better mom? Are you meeting your mom goals? I feel like I’m getting closer to the mom I want to be, though not every day is a victory. For me, the key to meeting my goals is accountability. Writing about it and having to give an update on my progress definitely makes me more mindful of meeting my goals!
I also feel like encouraging you to have grace for yourself, has forced me to practice what I preach and have grace for myself as well. I hope you, too are making progress in this area!
So, there are five more goals that I am adding to my list—and a week to meet them. You can decide for yourself if they are goals worthy of your time, and if so, join me in crushing them!
Final Goals to Be a Better Mom This Week:
- Move School Outside When the Weather is Nice—You may have already been doing this, but last week, it was only 15 degrees here so this is the first bit of nice weather we have had. The beauty of homeschooling is that I can adjust our lesson plans for the day to include outdoor study…but I rarely do this! This is something I need to be more intentional about. Even if your kids attend public school and are doing distance learning right now, their lessons can be adapted for outdoors too.
My younger cousin absolutely hated reading. He just wanted to be playing outside after school! It was not abnormal to see him lying down with his head on his dog in a ditch full of snow with a book in hand. This was often the only way his mom could convince him to do his Accelerated Reading program! Move outside as much as you can!
- Remember to Take One Day at a Time—With more announcements of cancellations coming, it can be really frustrating. It feels as though every two weeks or so, there is more bad news, and that can be incredibly disappointing for our kids. I need to allow my children the space they need to be frustrated by this and not downplay their feelings! As adults, we have tendencies to see the bigger picture and realize that this is not the end of the world and that life will move on at some point (though I don’t think it will ever go back to “normal.”)
Remember to take one day at a time. Instead of thinking of a thousand ways to make the next month memorable, think of one way to make today fun. Ask your child to help you! One day, when my kids were all a little on edge, I asked my kids, “Let’s think of something fun to do.” My youngest daughter brought a bag of balloons and said, “This will be fun!” All it took for her was a BALLOON!
- Ask, Don’t Tell—When your child shares with you how he or she is feeling, ask questions, don’t tell your child what to do or how to feel. Part of raising your children to be independent thinkers is to …actually expect them to think. If we are telling them what to do about every situation, how will they learn for themselves?
This begins at an early age, but is especially important during the teenage years. Teenagers can get caught up in the emotions of the moment quickly. Instead of downplaying those feelings, you can say, “That must be so frustrating. What do you think would help?”
- Have Extra Grace—This is especially important right now, but I think this is a long-term goal that will hopefully last much longer than COVID-19. I’m not sure there’s such a thing as having too much grace for our children. Let’s remind our children a little more that they are loved—especially when they’ve messed up. Remember to ask yourself, “who am I mad at?” when you’re frustrated, so that you’re not constantly barking at your kids.
Remember to have extra grace for yourself too. You can let something slide so that you can get a little bit of time to yourself. Or you can let a chore slide so that you can have good, quality time with your children. And if you’re not completing everything you wish to get done, don’t sweat it! You shouldn’t end up with any drop-in company right now.
- Affirm at Bedtime—This one is the most important of these goals to me. I was listening to Dr. Kathy Koch speak and she said something that really struck me. She asked parents to consider ending each day with a blessing to our children. Of course, we always pray before bedtime and we tell our children we love them, but often, our last words to them end up being, “If I have to come up here again, you will be doing chores all day tomorrow! Now be quiet and go to sleep!”
But Dr. Koch suggested speaking words of affirmation from the Bible to our children before they go to sleep. Every night, the last words our children hear from us would be something like, “You are chosen.” “God has big plans for you.” “The Lord is for you; who can be against you?” You get the picture.
That would send a powerful message to our children. It’s a message I want to send to my kids and right now, the most important of my mom goals. (That means I’m going to write it down and make a game plan to achieve it!)
Five new goals—seven days to reach them! Let’s do this, ladies!